A Bit About Me (Us)

Perhaps it would be fitting, here at the beginning, to post a little about myself.

I don't make a habit of publishing too much personal information about myself or my family anywhere on the internet. While I have a Facebook account, to me it is an instrument of necessity and utility, not social engagement or habit - in short, I use it when I must. Although it would not be hard, in this day and age, for a person to find out more about me than I would like (certainly the NSA could give lessons on the subject), I see no reason to make it any easier to do so. It may be that at some point in the future I will become more open and forthcoming, but for now... I know too much about what goes on in here (the internet).

To my friends and family who I have invited here, you know me and I know you - 'nuff said.

To those who are not part of that group, if ever there be any who choose to wander in, suffice it to say that... (wait for it)... I was born of goodly parents! <Groan>

Yeah, kind of cheesy, but still...

In order that you might have some idea where I am coming from, a little background. Although I was raised in Utah, I do not consider myself to be a "Utah Mormon." The summers of my youth were spent happily in the area surrounding my grandparents' farm in central Idaho, and that place still feels like home to me. I served a mission to Germany, and still consider it to be one of the most worthwhile activities of my life. And, I lived for a while among the heathen in Colorado (you know who you are). So I have been exposed to life outside "the bubble" - and yet I currently reside in the heart of "Happy Valley."

At the current time, I am nearing the half-century mark. I am happily married and have been for the past 22 years. I have six children, ranging in age from 14 (damn teenagers) to 4 months (cutest kid ever born). My wife and kids are all with me on this spiritual odyssey - as a matter of fact, you can blame this blog on them.

One of the things we (my wife and I) have wrestled with in the recent past is how much to involve our children in what we are doing. How public should we be with our new-found beliefs and attitudes? How will it affect our relationships - and theirs (the childrens')? 

At first, being a little unsure of ourselves, we determined to keep it on the dl. We quickly found that it would be impossible to exclude them from our conversations and study - nor did we really want to. As we go forward, we are finding more and more that this is leading to awkward situations with the friends and neighbors in our ward - and somehow it just doesn't feel right to "keep secrets." Definitely not healthy, and in the end it will just lead to bad things.

So we've decided to "come out" - and this experience has helped me better understand what our homosexual brothers and sisters struggle with as they go through similar experiences - although it isn't clear at this point what we're coming out as. Apostates? No. Disaffected Mormons? Not really. And its not as if we're planning to get up in Fast & Tell-a-story meeting and say, "Hey, we believe you're teaching false doctrine!"

We will respect the church's right to teach what they believe, and it is not our intention to proselytize or condemn those who don't see things as we do, or to be in any way disruptive. It is our belief that from this point on we will be better members of the church than we have ever been before. But we have decided that in our private and social discussions we will be completely open and honest about where we stand and what we believe, and it would be naive to think that, in current LDS society, this will not have some repercussions. It is our hope that these will be more positive than negative.

Another personal note - I must confess to all and here publicly that I have a Word of Wisdom problem. Any who have seen me know that I currently weigh in the neighborhood of 400 lbs. This is not good, and it must change. It is my hope that by making this a public (or at least semi-public) issue, I can gain you support and encouragement as I embark on an earnest effort to become half the man I used to be.

Updates to follow.