When in the Course of Human Events...

In our church we are taught that the founding of America was inspired by God and brought about by His sustaining power (1 Nephi 13:12-19). As Mormons we acknowledge His hand in the provenance of our founding documents, and the structure and operation of government established thereby. The principles set forth in the Declaration of Independence, Constitution and Bill of Rights are to us self-evident (at least to those of us not named Harry Reid, apparently).

Those principles and that framework are under heavy attack right now. At its heart, this struggle goes all the way back to the pre-existence: individual liberty (agency) versus central control. It is an eternal irony that although this central control is always pronounced as being on behalf of, or in the interest of, the many or the collective, it unfailingly ends up ultimately serving the interest of an elite few (or one).

It may be that this impetus to central control comes from some sort of evolutionary imperative that is inherent within any organized body - this I do not know. Whether the urge is internal or from an external source such as Lucifer and his minions, however, it is clear that it can only be overcome by education on the part of the individual, and a consistent, diligent effort on his part to prevent his God-given agency from being encroached upon.

Where am I going with this? Recently I have had cause to consider the history and progression of the LDS church, and it seems to me that the same alarming trends toward centralization of power that are seen in our political governments can be observed in the bodies of our church government as well. How many of us actually believe D&C 107:36? Should we not be as zealous in safeguarding our rights and liberties in the latter realm as in the former? 

It has been said that that man who would sacrifice his liberty for security deserves neither, and I believe this to be equally true in both spheres. There may be security in following a prophet, but is this what the Lord truly intends for us? Agency is not freedom to choose, it is the freedom to bear responsibility or accountability for the choices that we make. It would certainly be safer and easier to place that burden on the shoulders of a prophet, and claim that we are just following the Lord's anointed, but is it really that easy? 

Might not the real test be to see if we will jealously safeguard that agency that He has given us, and stand on our own feet? If we would become like Him, must we not learn to fight our own battles, to learn to not be deceived so that we can come unto Him and receive all that he would give us?

Salvation will not come from Washington, DC - nor will it come from Salt Lake City. It will come from building up our homes and neighborhoods, from sharing the burdens of those in our lives not because we are told to, but because we choose to. In so doing we all grow together and come to a knowledge of Christ in ourselves, not by having someone else hand it to us.

A Bit About Me (Us)

Perhaps it would be fitting, here at the beginning, to post a little about myself.

I don't make a habit of publishing too much personal information about myself or my family anywhere on the internet. While I have a Facebook account, to me it is an instrument of necessity and utility, not social engagement or habit - in short, I use it when I must. Although it would not be hard, in this day and age, for a person to find out more about me than I would like (certainly the NSA could give lessons on the subject), I see no reason to make it any easier to do so. It may be that at some point in the future I will become more open and forthcoming, but for now... I know too much about what goes on in here (the internet).

To my friends and family who I have invited here, you know me and I know you - 'nuff said.

To those who are not part of that group, if ever there be any who choose to wander in, suffice it to say that... (wait for it)... I was born of goodly parents! <Groan>

Yeah, kind of cheesy, but still...

In order that you might have some idea where I am coming from, a little background. Although I was raised in Utah, I do not consider myself to be a "Utah Mormon." The summers of my youth were spent happily in the area surrounding my grandparents' farm in central Idaho, and that place still feels like home to me. I served a mission to Germany, and still consider it to be one of the most worthwhile activities of my life. And, I lived for a while among the heathen in Colorado (you know who you are). So I have been exposed to life outside "the bubble" - and yet I currently reside in the heart of "Happy Valley."

At the current time, I am nearing the half-century mark. I am happily married and have been for the past 22 years. I have six children, ranging in age from 14 (damn teenagers) to 4 months (cutest kid ever born). My wife and kids are all with me on this spiritual odyssey - as a matter of fact, you can blame this blog on them.

One of the things we (my wife and I) have wrestled with in the recent past is how much to involve our children in what we are doing. How public should we be with our new-found beliefs and attitudes? How will it affect our relationships - and theirs (the childrens')? 

At first, being a little unsure of ourselves, we determined to keep it on the dl. We quickly found that it would be impossible to exclude them from our conversations and study - nor did we really want to. As we go forward, we are finding more and more that this is leading to awkward situations with the friends and neighbors in our ward - and somehow it just doesn't feel right to "keep secrets." Definitely not healthy, and in the end it will just lead to bad things.

So we've decided to "come out" - and this experience has helped me better understand what our homosexual brothers and sisters struggle with as they go through similar experiences - although it isn't clear at this point what we're coming out as. Apostates? No. Disaffected Mormons? Not really. And its not as if we're planning to get up in Fast & Tell-a-story meeting and say, "Hey, we believe you're teaching false doctrine!"

We will respect the church's right to teach what they believe, and it is not our intention to proselytize or condemn those who don't see things as we do, or to be in any way disruptive. It is our belief that from this point on we will be better members of the church than we have ever been before. But we have decided that in our private and social discussions we will be completely open and honest about where we stand and what we believe, and it would be naive to think that, in current LDS society, this will not have some repercussions. It is our hope that these will be more positive than negative.

Another personal note - I must confess to all and here publicly that I have a Word of Wisdom problem. Any who have seen me know that I currently weigh in the neighborhood of 400 lbs. This is not good, and it must change. It is my hope that by making this a public (or at least semi-public) issue, I can gain you support and encouragement as I embark on an earnest effort to become half the man I used to be.

Updates to follow.

That All May Be Edified, and Rejoice Together

A Statement of Purpose

My intention in opening all of this up is not to set myself forth as an authority on all things that are discussed here - rather, I do so knowing that I have much to learn. My hope is that this blog can serve as a site where those who come here will do so in a spirit of love and cooperation, so that we can touch on these subjects of deepest import and all come away in some way enlightened and uplifted.

Abandon Hate, All Ye Who Enter Here!

I have visited many blogs and message boards - I am an IT professional, after all. I have seen some where comments are disabled or highly controlled - seems kind of counterproductive to me, at least for my purpose. I have also seen some where anything goes, and those often devolve into a back-and-forth between the two sides of the argument, with little light or knowledge being shared and much of the spirit of contention. This is also counterproductive.

My policy for all discussions here will tend to be liberal. I believe all have a right to weigh the evidence and determine for themselves where they stand, let them worship how, where or what they may. It is my site, however, and someone has to keep things in order. If I determine, therefore, that a comment or post is intended solely to inflame or does not contribute to the overall goal of pursuing civil discussion and edification, I reserve the right to delete such.

Let There Be Light!

It has gotten a bit dusty in here since the last time I visited. I thought it was about time I dropped by to clean up a bit and reorganize.

The last few years of my life have been an unexpected, and at times quite challenging, adventure. I have been moved by the Spirit of God to examine my life, and to look at things in new and "unorthodox" ways. At times I have experienced rapture and revelation, but also disappointment and abandonment as I have treated lightly the things which my Father has seen fit to send to me.

Since my last post I have continued to learn (though perhaps not as quickly as I should have) line upon line. I have been debating with myself what to do next, and recently it struck me that at one time I had actually started something here. The time has come, I feel, to pick it up again and proceed.

I guess, more than anything, this will be a kind of a journal for me - a record of the journey I'm experiencing as I stretch myself and continue to shed the skin of my former world view. I certainly don't feel qualified at this point to try to set myself up as an expert (nor will I ever) or to expound any kind of doctrine (although I will share my thoughts and insights - that is the purpose, after all).

Right now, this is a forgotten corner of a dead-end street in an insignificant location on the internet (figuratively speaking). It may never be more, but I hope to change that. I believe that I have been led and directed as I have been for a reason, and that the things I am learning are intended to be shared with the world. As a beginning, I am currently toying with the idea of sending an invitation to my closest friends and family, to join me here and begin a discussion. In order to do that, it will be necessary to make some things very clear here at the beginning. And so...

Things That I Believe  

1 - I believe in God, the Eternal Father, and in His Son, Jesus Christ, and in the Holy Ghost.
As a beginning statement of faith, that one is hard to beat, don't you think? The Prophet definitely hit that one out of the park (and any time I mention "the Prophet" in this space, you may know of a surety that I am referring to Joseph).

As I have mentioned elsewhere, I fully and completely accept Jesus Christ as my savior and redeemer, and vow to try in all that I do and say to honor Him .

 2 - I believe Joseph Smith to have been a prophet of God.
I believe that through him (Joseph), the true gospel of Jesus Christ was restored to the Earth - though much of the "fulness" remains yet to be revealed. That might be a good topic for another time.

I also believe that through him priesthood power was restored to the Earth.This priesthood, however, remains little understood and appreciated by most who claim to hold it, including myself. Another topic for another time.

3 - I believe the Book of Mormon to be the word of God.
As the Prophet stated, it is the most correct of any book on earth. I hope that I as an individual and that we as a people can learn to understand and appreciate it, to remove from ourselves the condemnation placed there by the Lord.


4 - I believe in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
It is what its name proclaims it to be. I believe it is the foundation of God's kingdom on the Earth.

That having been said, however, I do NOT believe that the Church is everything it proclaims ITSELF to be. It is an organization of men, led by very human beings who are every bit as susceptible to error and the enticing of the "natural man" as any of the rest of us. This should not be interpreted as an attack on their character, nor is it the result of any personal animus of mine toward them severally or individually.

I support and sustain the leaders of the church, both locally and generally. It is my opinion that they have a very difficult job to do, and I would not for the life of me wish to change positions with them. At the same time, I do not believe that they have been elevated to some higher level of spirituality or worthiness simply by virtue of the calling that they have received from the church. I could (and will) go into this more deeply in another post.

5 - I look for the establishment of Zion.
It is my most sincere desire to do all that I can to assist in bringing her forth, and if it be the will of God to be involved in the activities associated with the founding and building up of that heavenly city. My soul yearns to be there, with my family and closest friends.